Mine, All Mine

I pushed you to the edge of the map
Then after that I pushed you off
Just to watch you fall...

...And its my loss
My lonely
My mistake
Mine only
Mine, all mine, all mine
Its my bad
My broken
All my 'should-haves'
Left unspoken
Mine, all mine, all mine.

How ironic. I fear that, tonight, he walked out of my life forever. And as we said goodbye for the final time tonight over the phone, the song Mine, All Mine by SHeDAISY began to play on my iTunes.

Three years ago, we met. And we became best friends. We have stood by each other through the thick and thin of our lives, every step of the way. Barely a day has gone by in these three years that we have not spoken to each other once on the phone.

When we began dating, he and I had a big discussion about what would happen to our friendship if our relationship failed. We vowed to maintain a friendship. Of any sort.

No one saw back then that this would be the demise of our relationship. I never imagined it would fall to pieces in the wake of a spiritual revolution in my life.

I have found it unfair since I broke up with him to expect him to remain in my life. But he had. We still talked on the phone every day. I silently began moving on. And I silently hoped he would do the same. And he hasn't.

And tonight, to help him do so, he's asked me to step out of his life.

This is for real. This is so real.

This is too real.